Okay, introducing my lil brother here-

Rayyan Sa'it AKA Blue Ranger Wannabe.

Hahahaha.

I super love this brother of mine anyway. (:
Currently at home, trying to complete my English

ISPL. But somehow i just cant.

Hopefully i can finish it by tonight.

Lets pray hard for me everyone :D

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Listen up boy.

Its been real hard to tell you this.

But my parents have found out about us.

And about what we did that damn night.

I'm trying my best to hide your identity

cause they've been dying to know.

And if they were to know, you'll be in big trouble, i tell you.

So now, they are not talking to me but instead, they have

been calling me names eversince. Problems after another.

It seems that word spread around very fast.

Sooner or later, my reputation in school will go further down the drain.

My mind feels so numb. I cant even think straight.

I feel like crying out on your shoulders again.

But you're not even here for me to settle these issues

together with me. Tell me, what should i do ?

I'm feeling as much stress as you are but you dont seem to care.

Hohoho, i looked so studious in this photo. And haha ya, i was about

to laugh. Taken by Afifah Miami, fyi. (:

Today school was as per normal.

Study study eat study study study study study. Heh, as if.
But i did feel the pain (afifah, muscle tear eh? hahaha) on my legs due to

the three days straight of Capoeira-ing. At first, was relieved that finally

i could rest my legs but now i kinda miss our instructor, Tucum. :DD

I really want to learn more from him!

Oh, and when Afifah and i were on our way out from school,

we bumped into Mr Samuie (did i spell that right?).

And and the news is, attention all Capoeira-ists!

He wants us to perform during the National Day celebrations.

Hahaha, are we good or what? Hee sorry, i'm bragginggggg :D

We kindly turn it down. But do let him know if you guys want to

accept his tremendously great offer. (:

Hahahahahaha, you're a heartbreaker.

And one big fucking jerk. Forgive me for saying this.

Today is the first day of school.

And i just loveeee Capoeira !

Really cant want for tomorrow so that we can practice the 'dance' again.

But still, dad sucks.

How i wish i could just take a knife and kill both my parents.

But i just cant. And i've made a vow with Afifah Miami to be good this

term, so i will keep it. We'll just see how long this will last.

Amyway, here are the pictures for the sleepover and Father's day. (:

Cousin's Sleepover - 21st June 08.


Lunch with relatives and family @ Sakura International - Father's Day.

And to Deeluh Baby,

Be strong okay, my dearest cousin. I know you love him dearly

and its very difficult for you to let go. But things have changed now.

Guys like that isnt worth your love. Trust me baby, lets get on with life.

If i can do it, im really sure you can too. You are one sweet and cute lady,

so its his loss for not cherishing you. Like you said, believe in Karma.

He will get back what he deserves for cheating the pure love you've given

him all this while. Your love deserves to be given to someone else

who will appreciate it more than he did. No matter what,

you have to be strong. Always know that i'm just a call away whenever

you need me. Unlike him, my love for you will never change. (:

(:

I know i am strong enough to face this.

I believe i can do better than to wait for someone like you.

I ain't going to shed more tears for you every night again.

Even though i really love you, i still think i deserve better.

We don't share the same feelings for each other.

Never will you care and love me again, so i see no hope in waiting.

You didn't know this,

but you're the reason i couldnt accept any other love again.

Maybe one day you will realise that you've tore my heart into bits and pieces.

And if that day happens, i'm hoping i would still have some emotion

left in me to feel happy.

I'm not those typical girls who slashed their wrists out of sadness or

hate. I may have been once before, but not now anymore.

Cause if you can believe in Fate, i will believe in Karma.

What goes around, will come around.

Like mummy always say, "If someone hurt you, one day he/she will get

it back and suffer the same fate as what they had done to you".

Sorry friends, if i have been writing tons of emo shits entries

for the past few wks. But i can promise you that this will be the last

time i'm going to write about him. Because i have to face the fact

that he's never going to love me back and so, i have to move on with life.

School is reopening sooooooooooon ! :D

I'm still going to be Diyana Sa'it, the girl who laugh her ass off

with friends and seeks everyone's attention in the

canteen during recess everyday, as usual.

She will not let this hurt show.

And will never burden her friends with her problems, ever again.

No worries! She'll be fine.

This damaged little heart of hers will get better in time.

(:

Anyway, today is Friday, 20 June. 12.23pm :D

I need help in editting my Blogger's date/time settings!

A random and very old picture i found in

cousin's folders. (:
Thanks to those friends who texted me to show

their concern for my uncle.

For the information, he's doing very well.

Im in his house right now, and i can tell you

he is never better!

Was sharing stories and jokes ever since he came

back from the hospital this evening.

Thank God he is so optimistic.

Currently in his house right now, with his daughters

(whom are my cousins, of course :D).

Using Sis Zura's lappie and its so so cool

- touch screen siool!

Will be staying for another night or two.

And i dont know why,

but after hearing out her love life's problems,

i kept thinking about mine too.

Is it so hard just to give me a second chance?

You're still in love with her, then what about me?

She's the one you talked about to your girlfriend,

then whats with me?

All the things that we've been through together,

are you not going to tell her?

Are you still going to keep me in the dark, like you used to?

You could only see her pain and yours, but not mine.

I never knew you could hurt me like this.

Okay Diy, stop thinking too much la please.

Accept the fact that he can never be yours again

and move on laaa, haiyo!

DDD:

Currently: Watching Romantic Princess and on

the phone with Big Brother. Aaah, thursday eh

abaaang! Dont you forget.

And Angela Zhang is soo cute,

dont you guys think so?

And and Wu Chun is so so hot laaa!

I wanna hug and kiss his muscles :D

Okaaay. There's much to tell, but im lazy. Hehe.

Take care people.

Nightssss! (:

Monday, 16 June 08. 5.15am.
It was just yesterday, when my relatives, family and myself went out to have our late lunch together at Sakura International to celebrate Father's Day. We came in such a large group that the staffs there have to give us six long tables to fit the 33 people we've come together in. We had a wonderful grand feast. Everyone was enjoying the buffet, eating and laughing happily. We were all catching up on good times since it is very rare for us to come together like this. The bill added up to a total of $500. But all stomachs were full so everyone was satisfied. To add to this joyous celebration, one of our close aunt just gave birth last wk and we were all going to give her and her babygirl a visit. Since we were such a big group, three different transports was needed to carry us around - my father's van, my uncle's car and my elder cousin's motor (?). Haha. I was in the car with all my closest cousins. We were so excited to see the babygirl that we were all screaming and singing in the car.
Little did we expect what was going to happen next. As we were nearing our aunt's block, the van hit a barrier and its side door flung off to the road. One of our uncle, Wak Itam, was running towards the block. It was then, when we saw blood dripping out of his hand. We got out of the car and rushed to his aid. Everyone was panic and no one knew what to do at first. It was our uncle who called the ambulance first. And then another uncle called his family members down, bringing ice cubes, towels, water with detergent to wash the floor later on. We were lucky that it happened when we have already reached their block. Who knows what will happen if it happened at the expressway? Two of Wak Itam's fingers came off and another one was dangling away, waiting for its time to fall while the other two were badly damaged. Blood was flowing out real fast. The pavement was already covered with blood. And the children got scared. One by one started to cry. As the older ones, we had to console them and bring them into the house. Never had i seen much blood coming out just from a hand. The mums were all crying while we had to put up a strong face for the younger ones. The ambulance then arrived and brought Wak Itam and wife to the hospital. The paramedic told us that the big possibility is that the fingers will be cut off. And told us to pray hard. As soon as the ambulance drove off, all of his children started crying. It was real hard for me to control it anymore. Wak Itam is my favourite uncle. As i'm typing this now, i'm crying, i swear. A hand without fingers? How is he supposed to do any work? He promised to bring me out cycling today. But it looks like it was not meant to be. The police was also involved as it was considered as a road accident. And my dad was brought to the station for further investigations. The family was so scared. The driver will always be held responsible is such accidents were to happen. And the van is under his name. What if my dad were to get charged? Because the door was open even before the van stopped, which is considered wrong to the police. Our uncle sent us home in his big car as we couldnt take the van anymore due to the side door that had already came off. We were just celebrating Father's Day together. Everyone didnt know this would happen. It wasnt anyone's fault. We are all praying hard now for both fathers.

Okay, i'm done. I cant continue anymore.
I wanna get some sleep now. Going school later on at 12.
Wont be coming home for the upcoming days.
Will be staying over at Wak Itam's house to keep the daughters company.
Sorry to friends who texted or call me.
I was at the hospital and there was no reception there. (:

Thursday, 12 June 08, 2.08pm

So yesterday, went out with fellow group members to

do our Geog project. Met up at Westmall first, and i was late.

Woke up at 12++ when we were supposed to meet at 12.30.

But its not my fault! They didnt give me my wake up call.

HAHA. Kidding, its obviously my fault and i'm sorry.

Okay so they waited for me at Burger King as they have

their lunch before proceeding to MacDonald's near my

house to start doing our project.

After we're done with our project around 4.30,

me and the Dudes went to Jbs to lepak. Tapi sumpah

kite tkde isap rokok! Janji tetap janji okay. Nira went

home early while Afifah came over my house afterwards.

Sent her to the bustop at 6++ and then proceeded back home.

At 8, went to Imm with Dzul for dinner. Eh you, i nak my pictures la!

Reached home at 12 then called Big Brother. He was at his

chalet with his guyfriends. They seem to be having reeeeal

fun huh. Minum minum! Janji hanya tinggal janji eh.

You tgu aje, this tuesday will be my turn. :D

Anyway, i've found myself a new friend through Friendster.

A real good friend indeed. Neesyaa is her name. And i've

been texting her the whole of yesterday night. Really enjoyed

talking to her. May our friendship last ya. (:

And Syaeee! I've got two passes to VAUNT III.

Kite enjoyyyy the whole of Tuesday night. Cam, mau pa?

Pape text aku. Hugs and kisses.

Tuesday, 10 June 08. 11.24am

Im back, people!

From Malaysia, went holiday with family. (:

And im darn tired right now.

Shall just upload pictures and then, Zzzz.

While the family crossed the river using the bridge, i took the risk to cross by that (picture above). Sorry, i really dont know what that thing is called. Nyaaha! Daredevil kan ? :DD

Okayokay, im really lazy to elaborate.

But the conclusion is that i enjoyed the trip to
Kota Tinggi with fam. And i think we should do

outings like this more often. (:

Allow me to go bed right now cause will be going out with

my aunt later and i really need the rest.

Goodnight for me. And a good day to all of you. :D

Okay, yesterday. I went out with my Fiedot. (:

To search for her jeans and leggings. Went Gombak market first

before proceeding to Lot 1 to buy my calculator. Thanks Fie for

replacing my calculator that you lost. Kalau tidak, mampos aku! :D

Ate Long John Silvers. And ya, there's a makcik staring at us and

i highly suspect she gossiped about us to her children.

Boleh npk siool. Straightaway anak dia tgk kn jgk.

But what to do, people nowadays like to judge others by their cover.

After that, we went to a block to camwhore, smoke and slack.

And then kan, guess what happened?

There's this old uncle. He was looking at us,

with this stupid look on his face. At first i thought he

wanted to ask for ciggarette from us, but shy. Then you

guys know what? He showed me and Fie his dick laa sak!

Ew. The both of us straightaway went off to search for another block.

Dont ever say kite stim eh tgk konek tu apek. Turned off lagi ade ah!

I was laughing all the way, when Fie looked really worried.

We then called Nazirul to lepak with us.

At least got a guy to protect us if that 'Apek Goncang' come again.

Haha. Funny indeed. Lucky that apek cannot walk properly,

his left leg limping (mcm Mas Selamat la kan). If not, he could have

chased us and god knows, what will happen to us now eh Fie?

Hmm, reached home around 5. Got changed and went to Orchard

Lido to watch KungFu Panda with Dzul. (:

Okay, today. Went out to meet Hafiz, Naz and Miami Dude. Spent time with Hafiz and Miami alot while waiting for Naz. I'm really going to miss this handsome brother of mine. Then took lrt to Lot 1. Met Lysa and went to eat at Kfc. After that, Lysa showed us her port where she usually smokes during her break time. And she brought us free calamari rings la seh! Baik kan dia? Thanks alot. Then, me and Miami took bus 927 (if im not wrong) to Causeway Point. It was a reeeeaaally long journey in the bus. And while we're in it, we did a lot of self-reflecting on ourselves. You may or may not believe it, but the both of us have decided to quit smoking. For good! Ehem ehem.

We, Diyana Sa'it and Afifah Miami, do hereby pledge that we will refrain ourselves from ciggarettes and any other stuffs related to it. This promise is made on the 7th June 2008, Saturday, 5.45 pm at the Woodlands Civic Centre. God Willing, with the support from friends and family, we can fulfill our promise till the end of our lives. (:

By right it should be Thursday, 5 June 08.
I dont know what went wrong with the day/date settings in Blogger.

Im currently missing tons of people right now.

Hoping to meet them (ppl in pictures above) up real soon. (:

Yesterday, got a date with Dzul. ((:

He treated me to watch The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian.

A really good show indeed. (:

Wasnt interested at first but i was the more enthusiastic one

afterwards, while he was the one sleeping.

And dia belikan aku rokok la siaak.

Thank you very much, friend! :D

Then from Causeway, took mrt to meet

Nazirul at Lot 1 to return his SuperHero Movie Cd

before going home and to my lalaaa land. (:

Hey you. You dont have to feel so stressed up.

Dont you worry about hurting me.

I've always been failing in relationships anyway.

I wont let this failure again bring me down.

You take your time. Im not rushing you.

In fact i think your decision will not affect me at all.

Because i know, it'll never be me.

You do whats best for you okay.

And please dont feel bad for me la.

You're making me sad seeing you like this. (:

I'm feeling so bored right now.

With nowhere to go and nobody to go with.

Firstly, i would like to thank a whole lotta people

who had supported me by giving me shelter and food for

the days i had been on the running.

A big thankyou to Syaee Mollie and Zach Nollie, Bryan Tan,

Dzul Hisyam and Azura Yusof. (:
Most importantly, thankyou to my Granny Salma who

talked things out to my parents
for me and persuaded me to go home.

Thank God. Mummy has finally stopped crying now but

is still giving me the silent treatment.

Just a piece of advice from me to all teenagers out there -

Do appreciate your family. And always

remember that its your parents who brought you up so

we should be thankful for that. (:

When i'm terribly in love, i am willing to do anything to please the person i love.
But you took advantage of that fact.

And just because we did it before once,
doesnt mean we have to do it again that night.

How cheap do you think i am?
I admit that i can be naive and gullible when it comes to love.
I can give my whole world to the person i love even though i know he doesnt love me back.
It felt so stupid. To be in your bed, with our arms wrapped around each other,
when i fully know you dont love me.

You guys dont have to have the perfect eyesight to see that he was just using me for the night.

But i was too blinded by love that i couldnt spot the signs.
You said the first thing you will do after you break up with her is to make me your girlfriend forever.
But will that make me happy? I will live my entire live, feeling guilty,

thinking i was the cause of a couple's separation.

I'm sick of having to feel guilty just for loving you.

I'm sick of you treating me like your scandal.

I'm sick of you loving me only behind other's backs.

I'm sick of being your spare.
You've treated me this way before. We played behind your girlfriend's back then,
but she didnt come to know of it. Because i kept our secret well.

But if we were to play the same game again, i dont think i can keep it any longer.

As a girl, i know how it feels to have your boyfriend
secretly playing you out with another girl. I dont wish to be that 'another girl'.

But i was then. And now, i am again. To the exact same guy. But with his different girl.

Oh god. How much more stupid can i be?

I swore i could have slapped myself for repeating the same mistake.

But this time, the impact is far deeper.

Because i realise that i really love this guy.
All i wanted was for him to give me a second chance for me to make amends

to improve our relationship that i once spoilt two years ago.

But he's happily attached now so goddamit shit, i have to wait.
And eversince my 13 months of wait for (insert name) was a total failure,

the last thing i ever want to do in life is to wait for my someone special again.

But i'm still gonna wait, no matter what it takes.

I know that you are trying hard to love and accept her as your girlfriend.

And i know that your feelings are so mixed up right now till you dont even know who you truly love.

And i'm sorry if my confession made you more confused than you already was.
I'm sorry, i sucks so much that i dont even deserve a second chance to prove to you that i can

be a better girlfriend than i was in the past.

I'm sorry, i was so weak that everything you said sent the tears right down.

What you said could be true, afterall.

Maybe i should just forget you and move on.

But how i wish things would be easier done than said.

We've not been contacting each other for awhile now.

And i think its best if things remain this way.

Even though i'm missing you so much, i'm trying my best not to talk to you or

even think of you. But whatever it is, i would like you to know that you were the

best boyfriend that i ever had.

And i truly regret that i didnt cherish you then.

If there is ever a chance for me to make up to you,

i will make sure that i'll love you with my biggest heart and i promise

not to disappoint you with my stupid mistakes again.
Dear (her name), forgive me for loving your boyfriend.
Dearest (his name), i really love you.

People, im finally back! (:
Much has happened for the past few days,

eversince i came back from Pahang.
Hopefully the pictures ive posted below would

be enough to describe

the fun i had in Taman Negara, Pahang.
Honestly, the reason ive not been updating is because i havent

been at home for the past four days.
Had some problems with my parents and i just took off from

home and never came back.
But i'll update more on that in my next post kay?

Cause im so tired and havent slept well since days.

I'll just post the pictures and continue sleeping.

Will be back with a more wordy post when i wake up aye. (:

Nazirul is reaaally strong :D

Asthmatic laughteress ;D

Diy and Ain babeee :DD

I love you, Roommate ! (:

Canopy Walk :DD

Exploring campsite with Naz :D

With the dudes at Tanjong Pagar Railway Station.